I’ve never written a bio that future-me didn’t cringe at, so here we go.

Hi, I’m Kristin Diversi, and I’m the Eldest Daughter.

You don’t have to be an eldest, or a daughter, to be here. It’s just a turn of phrase I identify with. Maybe you’ll recognize parts of yourself in it, too. We’ll get into it, below, if you’re interested.

Anyway.

Welcome, Eldies!

Ya ever feel like the first pancake?

If you know how to take care of everyone else before yourself…

If you were the “mature one” before you knew what that even meant…

If you’re always holding it together — but secretly longing to be held…

You’re one of us. You’re an Eldie.

A proud member of the “we-do-too-much-and-still-feel-behind” club.

A caretaker with calluses and poems. (or your pick!)

A fixer. A feeler.

An eldest daughter (by birth, role, or vibe).

Here, we’re rewriting the script.

Letting it be messy, poetic, and real.

Unlearning what we were told we had to carry.

And finding our way back to ourselves — one story, one breath, one creative act at a time.

I’m so glad you’re here. You belong.

#EldieEnergy

“‘Eldest daughter syndrome is a term used to describe the unique challenges and expectations often placed upon the oldest child in a family. As the firstborn daughter, they are expected to set an example, take on more responsibilities, and act as role models.’” — Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor Jamila Jones

Other signs of Eldest Daughter Syndrome (not a diagnosable condition, by the way):

  • A strong sense of responsibility

  • A need for control

  • Carrying the weight of parental expectations

  • Perfectionism

  • Struggling with same-age relationships

  • Resentment toward family

  • Always putting others first

  • People-pleasing tendencies

  • Anxiety and depression

“Being a role model can foster leadership and independence… but it can also impose pressure and a pursuit of perfection. In some families, the oldest child may function more as a caretaker or even a surrogate parent, missing out on typical childhood experiences.”

— Kasey Scharnett King, LMFT

“‘The eldest daughter usually has the most expectations or responsibilities placed on her, feeling pressured to succeed, achieve, or take care of the family. They’re more likely to feel shame and guilt but also tend to be more independent.’”

— Avigail Lev, PsyD

“‘Female children often develop stress or anxiety. You may have perfectionistic tendencies, feel not good enough, and have a deep need to please others.’”

— Dr. Karen Eshleman

But here? Here, you’re not an eldest daughter.

You won’t be treated like one.

“‘The eldest daughter usually has the most expectations or responsibilities placed on her, feeling pressured to succeed, achieve, or take care of the family. They're more likely to feel shame and guilt but also tend to be more independent.’” -Avigail Lev, PSYD

“‘Female children can develop a lot of stress or anxiety. You may have perfectionistic tendencies and often feel not good enough. You may feel the need to please others, and that can result in not feeling good enough because you’re not living up to those standards.’” - Dr. Karen Eshleman

Cleveland Clinic article

The Guardian article

But here?

Here, you’re not an eldest daughter.

And you won’t be treated like one.

You’re seen.

You’re heard.

You’re felt.

You’re understood.

It’s safe to be exactly who you are—without shame or fear.

You sign your own permission slips.

We create our own families and communities.

And I’m glad you’re here.

Why I Write

Reading and writing have always been my escape—safe worlds to visit, spaces where I could breathe.

This is the space I hold for new worlds to form, for anyone who needs one.

I believe that creativity—whether through writing, reading, any form of expression or art—is one of the truest ways to connect with the greater consciousness, to serve each other, and to recognize our shared humanity.

Sometimes, we see ourselves in someone else’s words or art, and we realize we’re not alone.

If I can offer that feeling, even once, I’ve succeeded in this life.

About Me

I’m a writer, mother, bitch, lover… wait, that’s a ‘90s song. But I am those things. And a ‘90s music lover.

I spent a million years (and a lot of money) in school, only to do nothing at all with my degrees. I have an awesome partner, a superb kid, and two barky wiener dogs.

Why Subscribe?

If you want to read my work (or see anything creative I make), you won’t be at the mercy of an algorithm—and neither will I. This is a deliberate space for us to engage in an intentional community.

I would be profoundly grateful if you’d help me build my writing into something bigger, something that allows me to create full-time.

Free Subscribers Receive:

Some full posts + previews of paywalled posts from all newsletters

If you can’t afford the $5/month or $50/year, message me—we’ll talk.

Paid Subscribers Receive:

  • All content from all newsletters

  • Creative Prompts (for writing/art), like letter-writing, micro-memoir, poetry, unlearning logs

  • Creative Tarot pulls

  • Ability to share your work with community (Protagonists get first dibs)

  • Monthly workshops

  • Live Q&As or small group calls based on writing themes

  • Guest experts (artists, therapists, authors — DM me if you're one of them!)

  • Book Club (Protagonists vote on the book!)

  • Ability to comment on all posts

Full-Access Founding Members (Protagonists) Receive:

  • Everything above

  • Early access to sign-ups

  • Behind-the-scenes voice notes & drafts

  • One bonus creative prompt and a personalized reflection per week/section

  • Community convos for our Eldest Daughters club

    (aka the “we-do-too-much-and-still-feel-behind” crew)

Supporting My Work

Paid subscriptions make it possible for me to keep writing. If you can gift a subscription to someone who wants one, it makes at least two people happy (them and me).

But, however and whoever you are, I’m just glad you’re here.

Cheers—to more of what we love.

Whether you sign up for free or upgrade to a paid subscription, you have my immense gratitude. I hope you’ll join me.

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Doing too much since forever. Eldest daughter vibes, creative writing, political resistance.

People

Elder millennial. Eldest daughter. Come because it’s your turn to be exactly who you are — without shame or fear. Stay for the existential dread and the poop jokes.